There’s no healthy aging “magic bullet” — no single exercise, food or pill that can guarantee a long, healthy life. But there may be something that comes close: strong social connections.
“Over many years of taking care of older patients, I’ve learned that the factors many people think are most important for aging well — such as having longevity in your family or lack of physical illnesses — do not guarantee a positive experience with getting older,” says Amit A. Shah, M.D., a geriatrician, internist and palliative care specialist at Mayo Clinic. “It’s the quality, duration and nature of your relationships that seem to matter most,” he says.
“People are often surprised by the literature that shows a correlation between social contact and enormous health benefits,” Dr. Shah adds. “Interacting with others is exercise for your brain — it’s one of the best ways to improve your cognitive flexibility. It’s likely more beneficial than doing crossword puzzles or other brain games.”
The health risks of loneliness and social isolation
“We hear so much about the risks of obesity and smoking, but loneliness and social isolation are just as much of a health risk,” Dr. Shah explains.
Health risks associated with loneliness can include depression, anxiety, increased risk of suicide and other chronic health risks. Studies have shown that for certain people, factors like social isolation, loneliness and poor social relationships are associated with increased risk of:
Premature death.
Dementia.
Heart disease.
Stroke.
People in certain groups such as first-generation immigrants and the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) community can be particularly vulnerable to loneliness.
How to make social connections as you age
If being social and making connections is essential to healthy aging, the question is this: How do you do it?
One of the most challenging things about getting older is that some of your friends or family members move or die.
“It can be very difficult, especially for those who live into their 90s or 100s, as a person might have a group of friends or work hard to make new friends only to see those friends lose function or pass away,” says Dr. Shah.
Although you can’t replace your dearest connections, you need to continue making new acquaintances — and stay connected in the relationships you have.
“I tell my patients: Action is important,” says Dr. Shah. “It can be hard, and sometimes intimidating, to be in social situations, but you have to do it.
“It takes effort to learn about a new person or make a new connection, but it’s very important to cognition,” he continues. “Think of it as a workout for your soul, your happiness and your brain health.”
Here are three ways to get started.
Get hearing aids (or use the ones you have!)
Hearing loss is one of the most common ways people become socially isolated. If you can’t hear, you can’t have a conversation. Luckily, hearing aids can help.
Dr. Shah notes, “When you can’t hear, your brain stops listening. There’s evidence that not correcting or addressing hearing issues leads to higher rates of cognitive decline.”
“Research suggests that people who use their hearing aids have a higher longevity and life expectancy,” he says. “It sounds unbelievable that hearing aids could help with longevity, but it is plausible. For example, if you go to a restaurant or social event and you can’t hear anybody, you might stop going out. Over time, you might become homebound. Decreased activity could result in a loss of muscle mass, leading to an increased risk of falls, hip fractures and poor outcomes.”
Get out of the house
Often, older adults are worried about leaving the house because of common age-related difficulties such as vision loss, incontinence, disability or lack of transportation. But it’s worth finding ways to accommodate or overcome these challenges.
“There was a successful program in Baltimore public schools where older adults read to children. Although the children probably enjoyed it, the program was really about getting older adults out for a meaningful activity,” says Dr. Shah. “It gave them a reason to get up in the morning, and their physical, cognitive and social activity increased.”
He continues, “When you put yourself out in the world, you learn new things and form new memories — that all exercises many different areas of cognition, such as executive function, spatial function and memory. It’s a workout for your brain.”
Actively look for opportunities to connect with others
Dr. Shah emphasizes, “Just because you are older, this doesn’t mean you should stop nurturing your current relationships or building and growing new relationships.”
To make new friends or connections:
Schedule it. Make a plan for keeping in touch with your friends and relatives — schedule time to email, call, send a card or interact on social media.
Adopt a pet. Animals provide companionship and often lead to interactions with other people.
Get moving. Go walking with a friend or try pickleball.
Talk to your neighbors. Casual chitchat by the mailbox counts. If you’re feeling ambitious, organize a block party.
Connect spiritually. Get involved in faith-based groups or activities.
Take a class. Or connect with people who share your favorite hobbies. See what groups are available at the library or community center.
Volunteer. A local school or your favorite charity would probably be grateful for your help.
Prepare for loneliness during life transitions
During some life transitions, older adults are at a higher risk of becoming socially isolated and lonely.
“When you’re going through a life transition, it’s important to establish a social network with mentors and friends who can introduce you to new people,” says Dr. Shah.
Retirement
Retirement has a lot of perks, but leaving the workforce often reduces the number of contacts you have.
“There is a vacuum that forms at the point of retirement,” says Dr. Shah. “You leave a whole work network of people who have shared common interests with you for years.”
He suggests planning how to stay connected with work friends and colleagues years before the retirement party is scheduled.
Loss of a spouse
Dr. Shah says, “The other big risky time of transition is the loss of a partner or loss of a spouse. It can be devastating, and some people never recuperate without social interaction.”
If your spouse dies, you have to figure out how to navigate interactions with friends and family alone. Finding a friend or two to discuss your feelings and emotions with is important. You might be able to join a grief support group and connect with people going through a similar transition.
Moving away
Whether it’s to move to a sunny state, be closer to their grandkids or downsize to senior living in their cities, many older adults leave their homes. Moving out of a familiar community can be exciting, but it can also be isolating. Making an effort to find new friends and social opportunities in your new city will help you feel more at home.